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in which she began practicing self-analysis and working on her repressed memories.
The notations in pencil jump from one topic to the next, wandering around the physical pages themselves and even passing from one page to the next and then back again.
She wanted me even to show a cruelty toward woman [sic]. In return, I showed her that I was faithful to her.
The letter skips through many topics and references Monroe's difficulties in breaking ties with her former acting coach, Natasha Lytess, and her optimism in beginning to work with Paula Strasberg.
But when you consider the habitat of the lion, it makes sense that if there was a gene for melanism, it would quickly be selected against.It is difficult to follow, but the topics include examining her childhood need to lie to her teacher, her physical insecurities, self-conscious thoughts of what others think of her drinking, speculation that "Peter" is capable of violence and possibly gay as well as a touching passage about I am so concerned/ about protecting Arthur/ I love him-and he is the/ only person-human being I have/ ever known that I could love not only/ as a man to which I am attracted to practically/ out of my senses about-but he is the only/ person-as another human being that I trust as/ much as myself-because when I do trust my-/ self (about certain things) I do fully, and I/ do about him also." Another revealing passage reads in part,"… punished me/ with fear and whipped me-/ ‘The bad part of my body’ she said-/ must never touch myself/ there or let anyone." It is believed that "A.fear to touch my own body/ after Buddy (I started to write Bad instead of Buddy-/ slip in writing? I." refers to Aunt Ida Martin, a foster mother who punished Monroe as a child, possibly after a sexual abuse incident, with the "Buddy" mentioned here. Remember, somehow, how Mother always tried to get me to 'go out' as though she felt I were too unadventurous.Sawyer, one of that year's five special guest authors.Since I had a new book to promote, I volunteered to conduct a workshop on Writing Dialogue.